Sunday, February 20, 2011

You know you're in a tight spot when . . .



. . . upon arriving to the Embassy from across the globe (about eight hours of travel)with little or no sleep you’re told, “We need your picture for your ID tag.”

. . . on that same sleepy day you meet with the Medical Director and the only thing you remember afterwards is something about vegetables, Chlorox, water and parasites.

. . . your housekeeper arrives for the day and does not speak English as you were led to believe.

. . . the few recognizable packaged foods in the grocery store are printed with three languages: Uzbek, Russian and something unrecognizable.

. . . a box of Cheez Its at that same store costs about $30.

. . . you can’t understand spoken numbers so the only way to pay is to just keep handing over money until the vendor looks satisfied. This is how I found out that bananas cost about $1 each.

. . . your teacher is boasting (in Russian) about your study habits to a fellow teacher – how much you study, how smart you are, how you always do your homework, etc. etc. – then the other teacher asks you a question (in Russian) and you have no idea what she asked.

. . . you must navigate on foot or by car among people who have a complete disregard for laws, traffic signs, lane markers and your very presence.

. . . about 60% of your home meals have consisted of chicken (because that’s one of the few recognizable meats here) and your parents are coming to visit AND you father dislikes chicken. Okay, I'm not in trouble but my dad may be.

. . . you are in a vehicle that is pulled over at random by the malitzia. You have been strictly warned (at your orientation – that same sleepy day to which I earlier referred) to stay inside the vehicle at all times and to not get out until (American) help arrives. The militzia instruct you to get out of the car and the American woman with you gets right out. (This did happen and I did not get out. Fortunately, all turned out well. We did not need to call for help.)

. . . you are studying a foreign language and, upon reading a word you don’t know you stop to look it up and, after seeing the English equivalent you then must go to your English dictionary and look up THAT word to see what IT means. This has been happening to me lately. It’s unsettling. How am I supposed to learn another language if I don't know my own?

. . . you have company over for dinner and, after dinner has started you realize that you have no dessert to offer except the Ghiardelli brownies that your friend sent you from the States. This happened to me last week. Fortunately the friend who sent me those brownies taught me how to
be generous and share. Some of you might want to sit down for this one. I shared them.




















This is me at the Valentine's Ball with Doug's Doug and I at the ball. We had
boss, Aaron, and my friend from Virginia, been dancing and my hair was
Alexandra and her husband, Terry. falling down.