A Desert is a Desert

A desert is a desert, right? Wrong. There are hot deserts, temperate deserts and cold deserts. Theodore National Park in North Dakota is a temperate desert area. Antarctica is the largest cold desert. The Sahara is the world's largest hot desert with its miles and miles of sand. My home, Phoenix, is right on the edge of the Sonoran desert but, from what I saw, has more dirt and cacti than sand (the dunes are in Yuma). It is scorching and dangerously hot in the summer, dehydratingly dry, not too cold in the winter and it has little changing blue skies that offer rare rain. Yet even though all that lives in the desert is so abused and denied, life thrives.

In Phoenix I'd lay in bed in the morning and hear the cooing and gurgling of doves in the rafters of our house. Here in Tashkent there is a bird that likes to sit on the bars just inches from our bedroom window and blast out its morning calls. It's not too unlike the infuriated parent trying to get a teenager awake and out of bed, but it has a lot more character.

In the afternoons in Phoenix I'd hear the regular rounds of the ice cream trucks playing four bars of either "The Entertainer", "Jingle Bells" (even in July), or "Fur Elise" incessantly for hours. Interspersed between that carnival-like sound is the ding of the tortilla wagon gently proclaiming "fresh tortillas".

In Tashkent the sounds of traffic dominate your senses. People drive with their horns. They honk when they are approaching you (whether you're on foot or in a vehicle), they honk when they pass you. They honk if you're in their way or not going fast enough. In Amerca while traffic lights flash green-yellow-red-green-yellow-red, etc.; in Tashkent they flash green-yellow-red-yellow-green-yellow-red-yellow etc. so the drivers honk whenever the light is yellow and you're not moving forward. They honk if you are approaching a street and look as though you just may walk/drive into it. They also honk for no apparent reason. And these cars have horns that can stop time. They are shrill and LOUD. When Doug's poor Hyundai arrives and we drive I fear it (we)will be ridiculed when we honk or lame little horn.

I dreaded mall-shopping in the states because of the vendors who had kiosks and carts instead of shops. they assault every passer-by interrupting conversation and thoughts with their physical obstacles and desperate sales pleas. In the Tashkent bazaars its the old vendors I notice. They sit until thy have to get up. When I pass I hear them solftly speak of and gently gesture to their fine produce. It makes me want to buy. It makes me want to bring them back a share of the soup I made with their produce.

In the states our currency is paper and coin with many denominations. In Uzbekistan they also have coins and paper. I have yet to see any coins. With inflation where it is I have only seen paper bills in denominations of 100 cym (pronounced "soom"), 200 cym, 500 cym and 1,000 cym. One dollar equals apx 1,600 cym. I think the least expensive item I've bought is an onion for about 800 cym. Uzbekistan is a cash-only society. One must carry a wad whenever going out. Bye-bye "Barbie purse" as my friend Julie lovingly refers to my bag. It's joked in the Embassy that we all look like drug dealers with our stacks and stacks of bills rubber-banded in groups of 100,000 cym and further subdivided into groups of 10 for easy counting at the point of payment. It's not unusual to hear Can you loan me 100,000?" "Sure. " The picture you see is a little over $500 in cym. And, yes (look closely, please) I DO have clothes on!

Your Feedback; My Response

I got comments on my last blog that I want to share. First I’ll show you Calliope’s:

From a historical standpoint, I vote to honor the sacrifice of women and not a few men who secured my right to do so (q.v. 19th amendment). I don't like feeling disenfranchised!

I don't care who sees me or doesn't see me at the poll--I'd love to have a mail-in ballot in Minnesota, so it's not social approval I seek. But I'd get there come hell or high water because I like feeling part of the process. While I alone might not make a difference, WE the people can.

I vote because I'm privileged to live in a civilized society. The corporations that run the country . . . have enough of a say, so even or especially when it seems futile, it's the only way I can register any kind of a complaint that matters. It's as much a vote against apathy as anything on the ballot, and for me, apathy is the biggest sin, so voting is the least I can do.

So... I've read and re-read your blog on this, and I still don't know why you didn't vote! It's not like you don't have time to figure out the issues or where the candidates stand on them. There's a ton of ways you can do that, without listening to one tv ad, either negative or positive. You can watch debates, or read transcripts of them, visit their websites, and read read read. If you're interested.

I agree with letter-writing . . . but I don't know if the numbers-behind-the-numbers argument holds true for email. However, people with computers can crank out a well-written letter just as easily. I do both, (and yes, I used to volunteer, put up yard signs, attend rallies, and march in protest, too) and I applaud your neighbor's efforts. But that power goes only so far if it's ultimately a substitute for voting.

Thank you, Calliope.

Another reader pointed out how devastating it would be to our system if everyone felt that their vote didn’t count and, therefore, didn’t vote. I agree.

I swiftly pointed out to this person that, although my individual vote does not make any difference mathematically – it won’t change the outcome, if EVERYONE who believed that didn’t vote, that WOULD make a difference. But I also said that, although my individual vote won’t change the outcome, it matters morally and ethically and statistically whether or not I vote.

To me, he was changing too much about my statement to make any sense. He was kind of arguing a point I wasn’t making. I recognized this because I have done this plenty of times.

Some may say he was comparing apples to oranges. (It always makes me scratch my head when people say that. They’re both fruit, for crying out loud. They have a lot in common! I guess that expression is just lost on me.)

This brings me to address an issue I have now brought up twice: the fact that we need to learn how to debate each other. I don’t believe we stand a chance at living in a more peaceful world if we cannot argue civilly with our relatives, friends and neighbors. Since I have said this before I decided that I should offer some solutions.

I used to argue with an agenda. I would “listen” to the other person – because that’s what you’re supposed to do – only to find a way to insert my opinion to counter theirs. That’s the kind of “listening” that drives people to uncivil behavior. I know. I’ve been behind the wheel.

I used to “listen” while forming my next argument in my mind. I didn’t realize that I only made myself look bad. My response to their statements had little to do with what they actually said. Instead of letting them know that I heard them and understood (at least grammatically if not in principle) what they said, I showed them that talking to me was a waste of their time. I, of course, didn’t know this at the time and I would have argued with anyone who told me that.

Thank God, we usually grow up. Sometimes it takes every ounce of self control I can muster to sit and hear someone out. It takes all the patience I can gather to actively hear them. And it sometimes takes a lot of effort to make sense in my mind of what they are saying. It takes respect to question what I don’t understand without inserting my opinion.

Taking the time to do all this can be very enlightening. It can also be disturbing. It reminds us how complex we are.

When I am sharing my views about an issue and someone asks me for clarification it’s an exercise in reason, self-defense and certainty in my own self. This is not easy; not remotely easy.

I used to use the most dramatic speech I could think of in order to shock my adversary into the light. I used to use punchy phrases I’d heard others use effectively. The problem was defending those statements since they weren’t really mine. I looked ignorant.

Many people defend their faith by loosing pithy sayings like “God said it, I believe it and that settles it” or “If it’s good enough for Jesus; it’s good enough for me.” Both may be true but, in my opinion, when you start involving a third party in your defense of your beliefs, you should have their permission and you should be respectful of it. I am not a spokesperson for God. (I just wanted to say that before proceeding). I believe that God demands more of us. I understand the importance of faith (defined once to me as ‘the substance of things hoped for and the evidence of things not seen’), but I think God gave us our faculties to use and develop. God wants us smart - especially when we are throwing the name of God around to defend our arguments. God wants us to use all we’ve been blessed with to seek the truth and find it. Those of you who are parents, here’s a question for you. When your child is 18 years old do you want them to look both ways before crossing the road “because mommy says to” or because they recognize the dangers of walking into traffic? To my ears, hearing a mature adult say “because the Bible says so” is like hearing that 18 year old say “because mommy says to”. I have a lot of respect for the Holy Scriptures; I enjoy reading them (although my Bibles have been in eternal storage for over a year now). I try to remember to take what I read in the Bible and discuss it, pray about it, observe its relevance and evidence of it in life. This is new to me and I’m still figuring out how to do it.

This applies to more than just the Bible, of course. Look up information for anything online and you’ll find an assortment of opinions and “facts”. The Atlantic magazine ran an article about whether or not Google was making us stoopid (sic.). We are becoming dependent on instant information. We are depending on having instant information at our fingertips and, therefore, not really learning anything because we can just look it up. Yeah, but what if it’s wrong? We need discernment and that takes some research, reason and commitment. All that, of course takes effort and practice.

One more point. Let’s say you are in a debate and you are right but, because of the way you are phrasing something or because of your attitude, the other person isn’t receptive or just isn’t understanding you. Just as we need to question when we don’t understand how others come to their beliefs, I think we need to question ourselves in order to practice the art of explaining. I used to get hung up on convincing people instead of educating them. I used to get hung up on winning the argument rather than on learning anything.

I spend a lot of time practicing this in my mind. Thank God my husband, Douglas, is a patient man who will listen to me. He said he understood where the comment I mentioned at the beginning came from. He said that I didn’t make it clear that I realized that the individual votes add up and do, indeed, matter in all ways. I do understand that. I hope this clarifies things.

Next post: Back to news from Tashkent!

A Perspective on Voting

My mother and I had an exchange last night. Not an argument, just an exchange over an issue we don’t agree on. Today is a voting Tuesday so this issue is very timely. I told her that I would not be voting today because I’ve been so removed from Minnesota for so long that I would have no idea as to who to vote for. I am not one of those voters who blindly goes into the voting booth and votes strictly party line. The only reason I am registered to a party at all is because our government requires it of us. Anyway, I also added an aside like, “Not that my vote matters anyway.”

She jumped to the defense of the vote. “Your vote does matter.” She said. “No it doesn’t.” I countered. I, of course brought up the shameful Gore/Bush election and she, of course, reminded me of the Electoral College. Fortunately we didn’t go on very long like this. We both stayed our ground.

I realize, looking back on our exchange, that I wasn’t very clear or well spoken. I should have said that mathematically my vote doesn’t matter. If I had voted opposite the way I did in every election, the results would have all been the same. Thus my vote does NOT matter. Fact.

Do I think we are all wasting our time voting? No.

Do I vote? Usually. I used to be able to say yes to this but since today is an election day and I am not voting, I cannot in good conscious say simply “yes”.

My vote matters ethically and morally. When I have a gripe about our government a typical response is “Well then, change it.” They say this as though it were a simple thing to do. They say this as though THEY know how to “just change it”. They also add, “Do you vote?” My vote matters because I can look at these people and say, “Yes.”

Truth be told, what I think really matters is letter writing. I think we all need to make a habit of writing letters to government officials. When a letter is relevant and well-written I believe they appreciate it. I remember one elected official saying that for every individual letter they receive, they consider that this is the opinion of X number of people who don't bother to write. (I don’t remember the number.) That’s power. That’s a lot more powerful than a single vote. One of my former neighbors in St. Paul hosted a letter writing party. There was a particular issue that was affecting our neighborhood. As I remember she even went as far as to provide officials names, addresses, stamps, paper and envelopes to encourage people to write and to make it easier for them. It’s much easier, of course, with e-mail. If nothing else, their response can tell whether or not you want to vote for them.

For years every issue or individual I voted for lost. I was pretty bitter. I thoughtlessly said “My vote doesn’t matter.” My mother (and others) were there to tell me that it did matter. I asked them how they could possibly say my vote mattered when everything I voted for lost? They sidestepped this question with democratic (as in democracy, not the party) rhetoric that majority rules. (Is this a good time to mention Gore/Bush again? No. I don’t know enough about it.) I know that majority rules or is supposed to rule. That fact does not make my single vote matter unless you are strictly into the statistics of it. To me, the final outcome being 1,222,375 pro and 1,578,893 against versus 1,222,376 pro and 1,578,893 against does not mean that my one vote mattered. The outcome is the same.

I love the stories of married couples who routinely vote opposite each other. They joke, "We're going to the polls to cancel each other's votes." Do their votes matter? Not mathematically. They matter statistically. And they matter ethically.

I think people who listened to me whine (yes, I admit it) missed a good teaching opportunity. “Yes, Laura, you’re right. One individual vote won’t decide a large election like this. One vote matters if you are on the Supreme Court and you are the tie breaker, but when the numbers are this large, one vote does not matter. What does matter is the interest you show. What matters is the knowledge you gain while researching who to vote for. What matters is doing your part as a citizen when there are so many people in the world who do not even have a teensy voice like this. That’s what matters. And you can demonstrate that in the act of voting.”

That, I believe, would have rung true in me. That would have given me pride in voting long before I had it. It would have told me that I did not just waste my time getting up early and standing in line.

Some of us who are wrong are teachable. Don’t forget that. We need to learn how to talk with each other even when we disagree. I’ve said this before. I don’t see how we can have any hope of peace in the war ravaged regions or any alternatives to war if we cannot debate with our family, friends and neighbors.

I will end this gently with a beautiful panoramic view from the last hike I took about an hour out of Tashkent. It took a lot of climbing to get up this high just like debate takes a lot of work. But when we got to the top, this was our reward.